Tuesday, April 8, 2008

Assoholics Anonymous

As of today it’s been an entire week and my celibacy is still in tact. I can honestly say that up until now, Hot Dude notwithstanding, it hasn’t been that difficult.

Of course I’d be lying if I didn’t also say that it felt like there was something slightly missing in my life. Affection? Certainly. Attention? Yeah, that too. But according to a friend of mine, it’s the freaking endorphins.

This friend has children so clearly she knows a thing or two about doing it (and then not doing it anymore.) And she said that sexual activity creates endorphins and people can actually become addicted to them. Endorphins are hormones that give you a sudden feeling of pain relief and well-being, like your body’s own smack.

Right before The Celibacy Project I was in a relationship with a healthy physical component. Without going into too much detail, let’s just say I was hitting the endorphins pretty hard and now I’ve gone cold turkey. Perhaps I need a Sex Patch. Side effects may include: incessant masturbation. Yeah, that’s pretty much the only side effect, and hey, it could be worse.

But honestly, I don’t feel like I’m desperately trying to get the sex monkey off my back. Aside from some boredom and the time I had to physically stop myself from texting an old standby, this actually isn’t too bad.

So perhaps it’s the attention and the affection I miss and I was never really addicted to the act, per se. Google told me The National Council on Sexual Addiction and Compulsivity has defined sexual addiction as “engaging in persistent and escalating patterns of sexual behavior despite increasing negative consequences to self and others.”

Um…..yeah. Okay. That doesn’t describe me at all.
Anyways….

Back to more important things. IT’S BEEN A WEEK AND I’M STILL HERE PEOPLE! I have NOT given up and I have NOT broken down and I have not yet spontaneously combusted. Let’s celebrate!*

That’s seven days down, and only 7,171,200 seconds to go.

But who’s counting, right? We all are.

xo

*In lieu of flowers or gifts, Allie requests that a small donation be made to The National Council on Sexual Addiction and Compulsivity's Scholarship Fund.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

This has been the best novel I've ever read and I'm hooked...and so is everyone else in my office, softball team and bible study group. Ok, that last one was a lie, but you get the point. I'm so on board, it's not even funny and the whole time I'm reading it, I'm thinking, "Thank God for my cowboy, because Lord knows the amount of Advil I've had to take each morning to get that guilt to subside. Oh and the vomiting. I could do without that too." :) Miss your face and love your conviction. XO